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Ponca City offers world-class entertainment during the month of June, including the annual Ponca City Herb Festival, Sunny Dayz Mural Festival and the 101 Wild West Rodeo. However, the most delicious fundraising event of June is Dearing House’s,
“ Fish Fry for the Small Fry.”
The 10th annual Fish Fry for the Small Fry will take place “Fryday,” June 21, at Standing Bear Park. The fun family event begins at 6 p.m. The celebration includes live music, children’s games and lots of delicious food. Teams will prepare their best recipes of fish, meat, sides and desserts for the crowd to sample. Each team chooses their own menu and can compete for people’s choice awards.
The format is all-you-can-eat with tasting kits for $10. Children under 10 eat free with an adult tasting kit purchase. The addition of big tents to the site adds a welcome layer of comfort against Oklahoma’s unpredictable weather. “Tent Supporters” help offset this cost by sponsoring a tent pole for $30. Event sponsorships are $200. Donations can be made online at dearinghouse.com.
“It’s a fun tailgate event,” says Mark Bean, Dearing House Executive Director. “While it is a fish fry, the teams present their own unique spin on the food to win votes. We encourage teams to decorate their space with banners, t-shirts, etc., to show off their team and to be recognized for being champions for Dearing House and children!”
CAC: WHAT AND WHY?
Ponca City’s Dearing House Child Advocacy Center is a haven when a difficult experience needs describing. A child advocacy center is, by design, a comforting space for children to respond as they are questioned about their traumatic experience.
National numbers show one in four girls and one in six boys will experience sexual abuse before reaching adulthood. Often, the child knows their abuser. This can lead to children keeping quiet about the abuse for fear of being blamed, shamed or declared liars.
Dearing House is a nationally-certified child advocacy center. The staff provides an all-encompassing list of services for child victims of crime and non-offending family members beginning at the Dearing House, itself. Some of these critical services include forensic interviews, sexual assault exams, crisis intervention and support at all stages of investigation and prosecutions. Staff and their caring expertise are available 24/7.
Sadly, the need for Dearing House Child Advocacy Center’s services continues to grow. During April, staff conducted 19 forensic interviews compared to six in April 2023. So far, Dearing House is averaging more than two forensic interviews each week.
Dearing House itself is a charming cottage donated by the Dearing family for use as a Child Advocacy Center. Mark says the rooms are cheerful and relaxing, unlike a police station or emergency room. “Dearing House provides the best possible conditions for a child to describe their experience without adding trauma or duplicating the efforts of the investigative agencies.”
REACHING OUT WITH KID GLOVES
Appealing snacks and a drink are waiting just inside the front door. A tour of the house and an introduction to the assembled investigators help relieve fear of the unknown. Soft furniture, bright colors, soothing sounds and inviting toys surround them. Behind the scenes, in another room, the police and DHS staff can witness the gently conducted interview while it is recorded for evidence. The result is this child victim is questioned one time while multiple disciplines get the information required to care for the child and gather evidence for possible criminal charges.
Forensic interview specialist Maggi Hutchason explains why questioning a child about a potential sexual trauma presents a challenge for the interviewer. “Children can be easily confused by the wording of even well-intentioned questions when the officer does not have the same level of awareness of child development as a forensic interviewer at Dearing House.”
According to Maggi, law enforcement officers are trained by their municipalities and the state to respond to victims and investigate crimes. However, very little training specific to child sexual abuse and interviewing child victims is offered. Dearing House pays for law enforcement to receive special training in how to ask a young sexual assault victim most effectively about what happened. Every year, Ponca City’s Child Advocacy Center budgets an average $18,000 to pay for registration and expenses for partner agency staff to attend training and improve response to child victims of crime.
Maggi says, “The manner of questioning children is extremely important to support the credibility of the child victim and to protect the integrity of the evidence gathered. Dearing House is the best and most effective way to respond to children as the initial statement from the child is the foundation of a successful investigation that can determine the child's safety as well as potential criminal charges.”
Dearing House staff take to heart the need to create an environment that allows a fearful and traumatized child to “unload their burden on a grown-up whose job is to take that fear and give them hope,” she adds.
Maggi credits the interviewer’s specialized training in asking questions in such a way that increases free recall. These adults are neutral, non-intimidating and don’t flinch or show emotional reaction to the child’s words. As a result, “The majority of the time, child victims are willing and able to give us more details than previously disclosed,” Maggi says. “It sounds trite to say we give children a voice, but without Dearing House, a child victim would likely be questioned repeatedly about what happened to them by agencies who need the information but risk getting wrong or incomplete details — or no information at all — which can lead to children left at risk and offenders not held accountable.”
VITAL AND UNENCUMBERED $$$
Proceeds from Fish Fry for the Small Fry provide important funding for the unexpected expenses that arise with each new case. Last year’s effort netted $15,000 for Dearing House’s annual budget.
“We plan well for the major expense categories such as payroll, utilities and insurance, but no two days or family situations are ever the same and we can’t predict need, particularly 12 months in advance, how we may be needed,” Mark explains. “It means that we can buy gas cards so a parent can afford to take their child to a specialist in the metro. It means we can send a police officer or therapist to specialized training or replace the bedding for a victim so she doesn’t have a constant nightly reminder of her assault. It means that our mission of hearing, helping, healing children requires us to respond quickly and efficiently to unique challenges daily.”
Mark and Maggi agree it is difficult to predict how the trajectory of an abused child’s life is changed by the help they receive from Dearing House. It’s important that Dearing House is always ready, 24/7, for whatever a child needs.
And a Fish Fry is the answer.
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